metamorphosis

Oh thank you, Universe for the permutation of fall.

Sundays Buff Creek Solo Ride:

27 miles

2500 vert

2.45 hrs

10.5 mph avg

empty trails

pure enchantment

Ed and I started and stopped in the same place today ... but had remarkably different rides. I should get a camera. However, not having a camera keeps me from stopping at all. Outside of bumping into two pals and having 10 minute conversations with both of them... there wasn't a moment that passed that I wasn't careening towards bliss in the magical state of Fall.

As everyone is reporting, the leaves are ramping up, the dirt is changing, the temperatures are changing, and we all seem to be in a reverent state of bliss.

Other things are changing, too; Fall is a time of change, and we all succumb to the cycles of the seasons.

My personal experience of fall ... is that fall bears lusciously fertile ground. For me, fall brings a remarkable amount of reflection. Fall feels earthy. And with that, a sense of groundedness always seems to envelop me. Riding in the dirt of fall, after the endless wear and tear of summer, always feels good. Like I can feel the cooler, wetter dirt on my hands reaching all the way through the tires, fork and grips.... It's like walking in silence, barefoot, along a soft, moist trail.

That fertile ground also seems open to a deep power of manifestation. Almost like planting seeds of dreams in rich soil; reflection refracting perspective, casting light on reality, past and present, desires, plans, goals, time unfolding into heart-felt dreams. The things I dream of in the fall, never fail to come true.

Fall is rich. And riding in fall, alone, ablaze thru the dark-dark green canopy of pine, illuminated with the glitter of the treasures of aspens, time widens, and experience seems so ... lucid.

One of my favorite things about todays ride thru the Fall, was the wordless whisper of the cool breeze, keeping me company along my passage through the woods.

I hope you're all out there, planting those seeds.

Jj

texas

Texas ate my mojo. And a whole week of work there has completely obliterated me.

Apparently I'm not so good with the 'travel and work' scenario. And, apparently, I'm not so good in humid climates. (You thought my hair was curly in CO!!! Waaaahahahahhahahha! Right).

My return home found me broken on the couch for hours. Until Ed appeared, and whisked me off to dinner: I was a pile of mush, napping and drooling on the couch. I also received a quick visit from Hil, who saved my kitty's life this weekend. THANK YOU HIL.... Tonka LOVES you, by the way. He says he wants to live with YOU.

I thought that recovery would be complete with one thorough night's sleep. So for today: off we went to ride N E W TRAIL (yeah, NEW... and 100% lacking in people, NO LESS). The first 1/2 hour was brilliant: twisty, slightly inclined, cruising thru the brush and scrub-oak, and wickedly fun.......... and then I hit a brick wall and I couldn't pedal to save my life. Legs felt good. Energy felt bad. I was T I R E D ... and deeply disappointed. Ah-well. I should have known better. I am required to take Dramamine when I travel, and I'm tired enough after a sub-40 hour week, let alone a 60 hour week. I just should have known that I would be a compromised chocolate mess.

But really, Ed and I had fun, despite the fact that I had to bail on the sincerely awesome crew we had intended to ride with. (I'm so sorry guys.......... I hope you had a brilliant ride in the fall light, ripping thru the scrub on the super scrumptious single track. Next time, I promise!!! You should ALL make it up for BeanFeSST with Paul)!

Good thing is: it was brilliant. I got to re-meet Paul (Loudpawls), and I am excited to see him again at the Bean FeSSt in a couple of weeks. Santa Fe is on the schedule for next weekend, and that means some seriously great riding, and some whole-heartedly deep time with a couple of my best friends (Jen and Arron.... and possibly my long lost pal, GLEN?!??!).

It's fall, finally. I've been waiting for fall since the beginning of June. Unfortunately, the light disappears earlier, but I need to practice being OK riding in the dark (alone) anyway. The neat thing about this fall, as I look at my calendar, is that it's WIDE OPEN. Makes things feel free.

Maybe I can focus on getting things (fitness things, yoga things, heart things) back on track. (Far, far away from Tx.)

Jj

the time it takes

focused not on passions

but on obligations

and without the satisfaction

of success

busy time

weightless mind

failing to rise

to the required occasion

the last week has been a quick-study in overcoming a seemingly growing inability to focus on any one thing for any substantial amount of time. scattered, frantic, and full of time lines and work obligations, i'm sort of at a loss for ... productivity!

and yet, my seemingly forever-ago weekend left a window of memory and experience of clarity and peace. of course ... riding on sunday was blissful. we left home on the ponies in the fresh, cool morning air, and returned hours later downright dirty and spent. ed was still in recovery mode, i'm in start-over mode, and we rode through the woods in pursuit of pleasure.

mantras on the bikes these days:

• what it is i love about being on my bike right now


• quiet mind. deep heart.

(yes, i do actually think these things while i am riding. it keeps me focused, quiet and centered)

our little jaunt logged us significant time away from the computers, and straight into a sense of satisfaction that lingers ... a sense of satisfaction that has followed me all the way to texas for the week ... and is awaiting my return friday afternoon.

jj

show and tell

for those of you who have to (are likely forced to) listen to me, you already know i took part in my cousins wedding this weekend.

the happy couple:
the event went off without a hitch! as far as i knew anyway ... but i was trying my hardest to mind my own business and not ...... um, pay attention.


it was a really interesting experience to watch my little baby cousin ... whom i had babysat, coached through countless crushes, and disciplined (yikes) since she was a wee little bunny... actually get married. i'm proud of her. i don't know what else to say.

lucky for me, i was adopted (for the weekend) by the maid of honor, kimberly, and her hilariously awesome husband, scott! the other happy couple:












also lucky for me, the whole weekend of rehearsal, and rehearsal dinner, and drinks, and pre-wedding dressing, and eating, and more drinks, took place high in the hills above durango, co. in fact, i was staying at a place just below silverton ... the wedding itself was about 25 miles west of durango.

scott and kimmy asked me (at a point well into the eating/drinking festivities) to do my best impression of how i see them as the happy new couple that they are as well. this is what they got:
i am not exactly where where that smile came from. i've actually never seen it before. not once, ever.










kimmy and jeny at the rehearsal (for good measure and because she was a rock-star of a best brides maid, and because i think she's a top notch woman):


so, the morning after (omg, i slept on the couch in an effort to quell the chaos of the 14 year old 1/2 sister ... not to mention the wine), it was up and OUT of the condo, heading straight for salida ... off to meet ed in his VT125 insanity adventure. well, it's not insane, in and of itself. but the riders might very well be.

well, not really. i know. i'm just so completely excited for all the people who lined up at the start ... and for those who knew the tricks in how to choose to finish. i hope to be as well centered in my endurance efforts at some point in the future. for now, i get to train and ride my brains out ... and some day perhaps i'll have the gumption to do it in such a venue as this. you guys blow my mind, and you inspire me to the greatest of depths. ed ... you've lit one crazy fire!!!

sadly, i do not have a picture of ed finishing the race ... or any of the other riders, or any of the scenery. go to ed's site. he has pictures. and they're damn good.

so. i have this other gem of a friend. her name is jean, and she is also someone i admire ... for countless reasons. this last particular weekend, i admire her for her tenacity ... her ability to commit, even when she flat-out broke, she was able to re-commit, and then to conquer. personal opinion, but conquering is what jean does best. she masters. jean lined up for the Wasatch 100 this last weekend. now, for those of you who are bike geeks (you all are, i know), this is not a 100 mile bike race. she lined up for this experiential portal in her running shoes.

this is jean at mile 39. she looks as in control, HOT, bright and chipper as usual:

















Ok, so a little (a LOT) further into the race, mile 75. all i can say (am allowed to say) is that jean had quite the cathartic experience here. i am happy to report that jean has guardian angles, and they know when to show up, and they know the precise magic words:












so, at some point into the race ...jeans feet looked (and felt ...because i know you all know how to feel through pictures) like this:
tell me this: how many mountain bikers would be ok with feel that looked and felt like this? huuuummmmmm??? i do seriously want to know.



and, this is a picture of jeans in the midst of her triumph ... over the internal battle, and external battle ... as usual having mastered a dream:
(jean, you think i'm a freak??? yeeeah.)











so, i DID actually get to ride this weekend, albeit about one-tenth of the time and distance that i wanted to. i got to ride with my father this weekend. we rode up the forest access road for cascade falls. the delightfully playful 4WD road turned into some wickedly delightful single track ... and we had a good time out in the national forest, adventuring through the river (mid-thigh ... ooooh-yeah, it was c o l d), over the absurd amount of rocks, roots, and mud. i am one hell of a lucky person to get to do this sort of activity with my father. i am grateful.

and that was my weekend ... and jeans ... and heathers ...and eds ... and kimmy's and scotts... and i'm sure, all of yours, too.

jj

off!!!

off to salida, to deliver Ed for the VT125....

then onto Durango for me.

sunday back to salida to ride and to catch the end of the race, i mean ride ........

good luck, ed! good luck every one else, too!!! seems it's the thing to do these days;-)


so full. so present. so excited. so happy.

jj

tick tock

not much to say this evening... not even about the long weekend.

another wall blue.

looking forward to durango this coming weekend (riding between wedding events for the cousin)

looking even more forward to GITA the following weekend!! (sept 14 thru 16)

looking forward to a couple weekends in santa fe w/ jen and aaron for october!

fall riding is upon us, and i'm greatly relieved.

phew.

landing

i have poison ivy on my legs ... on my arms ... and a little on my face. this is not fun. it was a riot of fun getting it there, riding thru the lush of an oddly wet summer. but the aftermath is a mess. so be it. i've lived here a total of 34 years and roughly 7 or 8 months, and I've never had poison anything before.

i spent the first part of the day indulging decadently in coffee, then meandering out to cherry creek to see dana off into her big 24 hour tri event. LOTS of people riding bikes in less than full shamoi'd shorts. ouch.

spent the second part of my day picking out paint, then applying it to a wall in my upstairs. i now have one wall of color, and it is a luscious shade of blue. i'm hoping it helps me sleep. i spent another part of my day re-organizing, moving furniture around, and generally re-landing in my space. it was well worth the sacrifice of a riding day. the first picture below is the wall/area before, and the second is after i got through with it today.


















i spent this evening/night with my sister, bro-in-law, mother and step-father in boulder, and enjoyed some home-made curry, a puppy i wish was mine, and a cat that used to be mine. i really like their charmed life in boulder. i should really visit more often. the picture below is of Llewis, my old cat, who now belongs to my sister.... he really likes her.



i'm not sure what else to say. probably a boring day by most standards ... more so that i didn't get out to enjoy the rush of air against my skin, or the rush of sweat and quickening of my heart beat. but you know ... i'm tired. i still managed to get a sunburn, and today was a very constructive day.




***********************************
this object
this space
in this light
attune

and in it, woven
base temperament
solidarity
and peace

blue peace
my peace
my space
my object
my light